With 68 percent of romances starting out as friendships, most of us end up falling for a friend at some point in our lives. But is it worth risking it all for a chance at something deeper? TBH, it depends, but your zodiac sign can help you decide if living out a real-life friends-to-lovers plot is the right move or not.
By knowing how you tend to approach relationships, you can gain more insight into your dating style and see if your feelings are just passing emotions or have the potential to work long-term. Geminis, for example, need a lot of variety and are inherently curious about other people, so it’s probably better to date new people, while Aries tend to move into and out of relationships quickly, which can be damaging to a friendship. Here, we’ll explore why starting out as friends could be the move and which zodiac signs can benefit the most from this approach.
The benefits of starting romantic relationships out as friends
Turning your friendship into a relationship can be a risky move—some of us end up like Jim and Pam, while others end up like Jackie and Fez (the writers really forced that romance anyway). When it comes to making the decision, there’s no blanket advice. You’ll have to weigh the pros and cons and follow your feelings—when you know you know, you know, ya know? I made the decision to date my partner after nearly 10 years of friendship (Scorpio and Virgo, in case you’re curious), and it was definitely one of the better decisions I’ve made in life, but I also know people who can say the same about choosing not to date their friends.
So why would you date a friend? Turns out, there are some pretty awesome benefits:
- You skip the getting-to-know-you phase. For a lot of us, dating is exhausting. The constant cycle of opening up to a new person, only to find it’s not working, and having to start from scratch all over again is a lot. I mean, you can only tell the same story about your trip to Spain or hear about your date’s cryptocurrency startup so many times, am I right? When you start off as friends, you get to skip this part because you already know each other, which means you can focus more on creating new memories together instead of giving a play-by-play of what you’ve been up to the last 30 years of your life.
- There’s way less pressure. The person you’re dating already knows you, and they likely know you better than a date ever would because they’ve gotten to know you without you presenting your “dating persona” (you know, the cool, chill version of yourself you show on the first date that definitely did not have a mental breakdown because you had to leave your cat at home). It’s more comfortable, and you can let go of the need to look perfectly put together that we all feel while dating someone new.
- You know your partner’s relationship style. When you’re dating and starting a relationship with someone new, it can be hard to get a feel for what type of partner they are. Are they clingy? Are they affectionate? Are they a narcissistic sociopath who spends an hour a day grooming their beard? These are all things you need to learn from scratch—and that can be scary. But when you date your friends, you’ve probably seen them in a relationship before and have an idea of what to expect. Sure, every relationship is unique, but you can at least get a feel for how they treat their partners and get the chance to see any red flags ahead of time.
- You have mutual friends and/or interests. If you and your partner have different interests or wildly different friend groups, things can get a little weird. Do you head to the sports bar or the winery on Friday night? Whose wedding do you prioritize? The list goes on. But if you have a love for the same things and the same friends, those decisions become one less thing to cause stress and take away from the romance. Plus, it can help your love for each other grow even stronger.
The zodiac signs best suited for starting their relationships as friends
While all the signs have the potential to have success in a friendship-turned-relationship, some are more suited to really make this setup work. If you’re a Taurus, Virgo, Scorpio, or Aquarius, take a look at your friend group because your future partner could be lurking around there somewhere (but don’t look too hard, or it’ll start to get weird).
Taurus
Dating a friend brings you security. As a Fixed Earth sign (i.e., stubborn and practical), Tauruses love feeling stable, secure, and safe. You would rather just not when it comes to experiencing the highs, lows, and back-and-forths of the dating world. Talking stage? No thanks. You’ll take the chill at each other’s houses doing nothing for eight days straight stage instead. But for real, entering into a relationship with somebody you already know can give you the sense of comfort and trust you’ve been craving in a partnership.
Your friend-turned-partner isn’t offended by your lack of affection. Now, I’m not saying that Tauruses aren’t affectionate, buuttttt… you definitely take a hands-off approach. Behind closed doors, you can be the most loving and affectionate partner, but even if you’re super into the person you’re dating, it can be hard for them to tell while you’re out in public. They might even think you’re not interested at all. Case in point: I once had a crush on a Taurus friend that I hung out with nearly every day, and it took me almost a year to figure out they were into me too—and I was dropping major hints!
Virgo
Dating a friend gives your inner critic a rest. Virgos are analytical and practical. Your standards can be super high—and by super high, I mean impossible for any human, including yourself, to reach. When you go the friend route, you already know that you like the person, and you know their flaws, so your brain isn’t scanning them for imperfections every 10 seconds. Since you know they’ve passed your rigorous vetting process already, you can finally relax and just focus on being happy in the relationship.
You know it’s real when you choose to date a friend. As a Virgo, the sign of the Virgin, you live up to your name in the sense that you won’t date just anybody. You have a certain purity when it comes to dating because you’re selective and rarely date for fun. If you’re dating someone, there’s a purpose to it. When you take the leap of faith with a friend, you’re not taking the decision lightly—you’re fully trusting your feelings and have weighed out the pros and cons, which can help your partner feel comfortable in the relationship, too.
Scorpio
You require full vulnerability. Scorpios tend to ask a lot of their partner. You need complete honesty, trust, and vulnerability. No matter how dark or ashamed your partner might feel about certain parts of themselves, you want to know all of them intimately. For a lot of people, the thought of opening up on that level is terrifying, so starting off as friends and establishing a solid foundation first is key. When you and your partner can share openly, honestly, and without judgment, it’s magic.
You need to feel safe in your relationship. You need to know that your partner wouldn’t intentionally hurt you and that they’re willing to stick with you and step up to the plate when things get hard or disagreements come up. In this way, starting out as friends can be a great move because you and your partner already understand each other on a deeper level. You know they’re there to love and appreciate all of you—from the loving, caring partner you are to the version of you that doesn’t shave her legs or put on makeup for weeks (is it just me?). This trust can let you put that Scorpio stinger down and settle into the romance.
Aquarius
You live for your friends. Aquarians are a bit different when it comes to starting off as friends—it’s less about safety and comfort and more about the fact that your friends are your literal life. Whatever partner you have is going to need to be OK with your thriving social life and various social groups, so they might as well be a part of them too. Plus, it’s fun to know that you love the same people and even more fun to see the look on everyone’s faces when you show up to the cookout holding hands.
Your friend-turned-partner knows what to make of your mind games. I know, I know—harsh. Am I saying this out of bitterness for the Aquarius who ghosted me a few years ago by literally moving out of town? A little bit, but mostly not. In all honesty, it’s not that you’re playing mind games, it’s that you’re just practical when it comes to romance—if it’s not working, then it’s not working, or if you need space, then you need space—and you’re really more the type to just focus on something else for a while rather than talk about your feelings. By dating a friend, they understand your need to just shut down and distance yourself from the relationship every now and then, and instead of taking it personally, they can give you what you need.